My Lady of the Lantern

I have too much to write and not enough time, so rather than posting separately and giving due honours to my ideas, I will just make a has-all kind of a post. I - Flashback We have a thing...mothers who drop something on their dress while eating sometimes quip that probably their kid is hungry. Before I say it, let's just say that I am not really Bella Swan in the eating department. But cleanliness? Yep, maybe. In August 2008, I was sharing some snack with a colleague and kind of dropped some tidbit on my dress. The fabric had a tidy splotch of oil from the drop. I quipped spontaneously, " Oh my child must be hungry ." My colleague rolled her eyes. She knew my stellar status. She asked, "Are you expecting?" I said ' No ' and laughed it off. Last Thursday, I and Birdman were enjoying ice-cream after our dinner, and I managed to have some chocolate drip onto my nightgown. I started smiling. I told him, " Oh Kaiser must be hungry ." I am so relie...

Before anything, I really want to appreciate the lovely and wisdom filled comments you left me on my previous post. They brought me insight and I feel better about having spelt it out. --- Last evening was my fortnightly appointment with Dr. BS. Chronologically, I was 11wk1d yesterday. Kaiser measured 11wk4d!!! I am really exasperated with keeping all the numbers intact really....everything still seems to be very fluid. But I loved my little champ for this. Kaiser was flapping his hands and legs. I was amazed to see the growth spurt...from the tiny being that I saw last, Kaiser now resembled more like an actual baby. And I told myself that this was my uterus that was being visualized. I was watching...my baby! I have planned to keep my calculations as per the chronological details only. My prescription got modified a bit and the drugs I am taking will change from 6th August. One thing, the baby aspirin will continue till my eighth month. My BP measured 140/84...slightly higher than usu...

* I am relieved to not be packing AF protection gear in my bags this time. One less thing to worry about indeed. * Thanks to reading it here and there, I have become very sensitive to my own EWCM pattern, and even though I do not have any ovulation pain, the gush of EWCM tells me what my body is upto. Atleast for the last cycle, I was aware. And this cycle too, I could distinctly make it out. The report card for this month is yet to be published though. * Metformin? I started waddling in the medicine slush beginning August 2009. Immediate to me starting Metformin, I spoke of how my loo trips had increased . Well, even though that part is subsided, there is one persistent thing that still is staying with me, and that is the bowel department has got a little screwed up – not good or bad screwed up, but adequately anomalous to the routine. I am not writing any more on this as it is very embarrassing, but it was important for me to document this as a side effect. * Another thing is that...

...that I would be a mother by today already? That this would have been the scheduled date for the birth of the baby... And had I been having all the three of them, they would be here already? ^WiseGuy^

Was I not chiming August? Wasn’t I? Well, my doctors need to wait now for my thesis to get submitted. Either my thesis will get submitted and I will romance ART again or my thesis will get submitted and I will suddenly wake up to a positive HPT on my own. Come on, you can’t discount the latter possibility coz we are unexplained which is not equal to completely incapable on our own. The inside details are here . I did not choose this…I chose a March deadline (doctor's advice too)…I was mentally unprepared and I chose August and now here I am, with the choice having been temporarily taken away from me. ^WiseGuy^

.....You want to do another IVF/ICSI in August? [[ Tada!! Bingo Boy! ]] Oh come on, why are you starting it again? [[ Duh, because I happen to want kids, you know. ]] Last year was so pathetic. We are already doing so much. [[ I know...2008 is a huge blip on my Good Luck radar. ]] Nobody has any idea what they want us to do. Doctors have no idea. We were asked to please the Gods. There will be some or the other excuse again. [[ Da. But I can't stop trying. I am as obsessed as Octomom herself. ]] Oh come on, do we have money remaining for that? [[ Valid point dude! Especially since we have no insurance, and no insurance is provided for fertility treatments ]] Why not take the entire 2009 off? [[ If my mathematics is any correct, I will be an year older this year than the previous ]] We already did the blam blam religious thing to please the Gods.[[ Yes I know....I am already doing what I feel like from the core of my heart. ]] You don't even clean up the God space regularly. [[...

For one, CPT is not hearing from me ....thanks for all the helpful comments. I have had mails to increase my manhood, buy Rolex replicas and purchase Viagra online minus any prescriptions. But I was not spam-prepared for a mail that invited me to write. Second, I am going to travel in May. In another of my previous posts , I had spoken of my travel what-if. I have decided that I am making the travel plans full-steam. If the trip gets scuttled, the reason will not be my what-if. Third, my doctor had asked me to not go for another round of IVFw/ICSI till March 2009. And that is what I had really planned then. But right now, I do not feel mentally up for such a cycle. I am thinking of not using any medical intervention till August 2009. That's all, folks! ^WiseGuy^