My Lady of the Lantern

I have been feeling very off-the-hook for the past few days. I am not really grinding myself with the who, why me or how of my infertility. Can I call it subfertility (it feels better and that is how one of my doc files recites my case)? There is something gnawing at me and I am seeking some closure for it. Nancy wrote a beautiful comment for me on a previous post. Though it singed to read it initially, I have to thank her for being resolute and pointing out facts rather than just core-cushioning me. And though I did not write much of a response to her beyond a sheer ~Thank You~, she gave me a lot of food for thought. So here it is: I believe I was pregnant. And that my beta was tested after the levels started falling, hence the BFN. For me any later pregnancy and resulting children will not be 4, 5 or 6. I believe my babies are destined for my womb only. And so those who went away will come back to me again eventually. I am at peace, for now! ^WiseGuy^