This is about a boy I haven't met.
An ex-colleague/friend of my hubby got married a couple of years back. We could not attend the wedding. His wife had a son about a week off from their first wedding anniversary.
He phoned us to tell about his new son, but there wasn't much communication between us after that.
That boy, their only child, is now a little over two years old.
And he has been diagnosed with a disease, where the doctors are talking of 'quality of life' rather than recovery. Simply put, there is no known cure to that dy.strophy.
I am at a complete loss of words. That fellow mailed me his son's reports to see if I can get any references from SuperPed of good doctors, anybody...but so far, it is all in a discussion stage.
What do you say? What thoughts you offer to a child who can't be saved?
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If you remember CBub's birth (and death story), I added a tiny detail of someone who lost their son in-utero about a week before I gave birth. That miracle baby was an ICSI child. There were no frozen embryos from that cycle.
The lady was asked to sit out of the TTC ring for 6 months, and later she decided to take the rest of the year off from TTC.
She is currently pursuing ICSI #2.
I met her recently. And she wanted to hold Figlia, and was playing with her. And I almost felt very guilty.
We both lost our dreams at the same time. I got a chance and sailed through.
She is still struggling.
I wish that her cycle will be fruitful for her. May this year-end bring her, her child(ren).
(On another note: I wonder what would the 'actors' in our blog posts think, if they came to know they were referred to in it?)
I know that those you've referenced in this blog post would be honored and touched to know that you are holding them in your heart in this way. You clearly "get it," which is something I'm fairly sure they wouldn't be able to say about many other people in their lives.
ReplyDeleteI'm keeping all of them in my thoughts and prayers, too.
My sympathies to your friend - I hope that there is something that can be done for his son. And if not, I hope his life is as peaceful and pain-free as possible.
ReplyDeleteAnd your other friend...well, she knows that you know. I hope her struggles are soon rewarded.
This is a very sobering post.
ReplyDeleteI don't know if there's anything you can do for that boy other than give him love. One of the keynote speakers at a conference I was organizing had to cancel at the last minute because his 8-year old son had died - also of a dy.strophy that he was diagnosed with at the age of 2. People who had met the boy said they that he was very wise and graceful - accepting his life (and its end) the way only a child can.
I hope with you that this year will bring the other bereaved mother her child(ren) she so longs for.
how sad, i hope she gets the child she is wishing for.
ReplyDeleteI don't know what one says to your friend whose son has been given that diagnosis. What I do know is that just being there for them in their time of need must help ease the burden a bit. Stay there for them...
ReplyDeleteAs for your friend, I hope her struggles are over with this next ICSI attempt. She knows you know and I think in a way you are her hope. She can see thru you that she too can have another chance at her dream.
xxx
I think your friends would be touched to see how much you care. I wish them all the best. They are in most unfortunate situations...
ReplyDeleteI think your friend would be touched, too. In the last three months I've found it dry healing and helpful to hold others' babies...almost as an affirmation to what I want so badly for myself, a way to show my body what it WILL Feel like to hold my own living. Any in my arms instead of letting myself remain stuck in the reality that my only babies, my twins, died.
ReplyDeleteIt seems to me that sadness and blessings are sprinkled out randomly--there is no rhyme or reason. It isn't a zero-sum game. Your having Figlia doesn't take a baby away from anyone else. The human mind has difficulty wrapping around unfairness, doesn't it?
ReplyDelete