Time: Today Morning, when we were pseudo-ready to jump out of bed.
Situation: A financial review of 2008 (not exactly a dream year in a lot of respects)
DH: Mmm… and the price of that land is down x percent, and the real estate rates on that house have slipped y percent….and z month’s salary has been invested into the share market, so I can’t make a deposit out of it and can’t touch it for p years….
BTW, would you be doing IVF w/ICSI again this year?
Me: (Mentally- Damn right, I will). Of Course. But we are not to do anything till March, you know!
DH: Last time it cost us $$$$$, and still there is no guarantee that it will work out this time.
Me: (Mentally – Yeah, but what if it does?) There is no guarantee, but I am doing it.
Momentary Silence…
DH: There will be no savings this year.
The last statement is too severe. But I did not want to cut in and spoil DH’s sense of financial calculation superiority complex.
Frankly, I know that IF treatments are pinching us financially, but I am not worried because there are still a lot of work-years left for both of us, and money is a totally recoverable and secondary entity for me at this point of time.
^WiseGuy^
Situation: A financial review of 2008 (not exactly a dream year in a lot of respects)
DH: Mmm… and the price of that land is down x percent, and the real estate rates on that house have slipped y percent….and z month’s salary has been invested into the share market, so I can’t make a deposit out of it and can’t touch it for p years….
BTW, would you be doing IVF w/ICSI again this year?
Me: (Mentally- Damn right, I will). Of Course. But we are not to do anything till March, you know!
DH: Last time it cost us $$$$$, and still there is no guarantee that it will work out this time.
Me: (Mentally – Yeah, but what if it does?) There is no guarantee, but I am doing it.
Momentary Silence…
DH: There will be no savings this year.
The last statement is too severe. But I did not want to cut in and spoil DH’s sense of financial calculation superiority complex.
Frankly, I know that IF treatments are pinching us financially, but I am not worried because there are still a lot of work-years left for both of us, and money is a totally recoverable and secondary entity for me at this point of time.
^WiseGuy^
Amen to the "more than enough" mindset, regarding money of course. It's what allows me to sit here writing a book that WILL sell someday without stressing (too much) about next month's mortgage payment.
ReplyDeleteGood for you! Want a little mental backup? Go to this blog - right now!!
http://noswimmers.blogspot.com/
"recoverable and secondary entity"
ReplyDeleteYes! Exactly! I wish more people had your attitude -- it wouldn't change the bottom line, but it would make them feel much less guilty about the huge IF expenditures.
I think if I tried to do financial calculations in bed, DH would run out of the room screaming. And vice versa.
what really bothered me in his reasoning, and you'll have to forgive me to be so blunt, is that he asked "would you be doing IVF/ICSI?" He used you, as this is only your thing, not something that he is really involved with.
ReplyDeleteyeah, the financial burden is a real pain in the ass, but you have to try until you just can't try anymore.
ReplyDeleteDh and I did our finances too. I hate how $ determines so much. I'm glad you're going ahead with your dream and not letting it get in the way.
ReplyDeleteI hate arguing finances. Ungh.
ReplyDeleteBut you are correct, I believe. Money is completely recoverable. You have the rest of your life to accumulate it. But the here and now, is well... here and now.
Follow your dream.
Best wishes hun.
That conversation sounds soooooo familiar!
ReplyDeletei am using lupron depots, they are administered intramuscularly.
ReplyDeleteYou hit the nail on the head when you said "Money is recoverable" ... it's so true. AND not to mention, this is the best investment you could make ... better than an real estate investment I've made (though I haven't succeeded at it yet on the baby front) my houses are about to turn up-side-down ... so it's not like real investments are 100% good ideas!
ReplyDeleteI hate having conversations with DH about $$ and fertility - keep your chin up.