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'I am not talking to'

The title is a rendition of what Figlia tells me when she wants to say that she would like to shut up for a few long nanoseconds. Her chatter is non-stop and she follows me like a tail in the house. I cant even get up from the potty without her telling me to flush it (that sounds funny here).

However, what really gets to me is the fact that Figlia is frequently in 'I am upset with you' mode, and sometimes, I have just entered into the house and that happens to be the first statement she makes to me. 

Given that I do not expect a "How was your day?" from her, but I don't even want to hear that 'upset' line as often as it comes out from her. I know that she says that on a very superficial level, because it hardly turns out that there is some valid reason for it, but currently, she is still in the phase where I have to tell her repeatedly that she has no reason to be upset with me. 

The second bite is food. My girl loves food. That makes my life simple, because mealtimes are hardly a struggle with her. However, she is so conditioned to associate parties with food, that we have to just about get to the venue when she starts asking for food. 

One day at home, because she was loving the food that was there for dinner and asking for portions beyond what she normally consumes, I joked that her father will only have leftovers to eat. Since then she thought it was some good thing that her dad would eat leftovers. 

Yesterday, I finally told her that the food was for everyone, and that when she eats she must look at if everyone has sufficient left. I told her that not just her father, her mother has the same food that she has, and that eventually, M would also eat the same. 

Figlia is 3 years and almost 9 months. I am not sure if this lesson is too harsh to learn currently. 

She hardly wrecks the kind of havoc on her father, the way she shows her temper to me. And yet, sometimes talking to her, feels like me talking to me (and that is scary).

Figlia shows immense maturity in most things. She was the only child on the trip (which happened just last week), but as everyone has appreciated, she was the least fussy too. She took the travelling, and sightseeing with much gusto. 

So I am looking at gently moulding this behaviour to a more palatable one. I don't expect her to be docile, but sometimes her constant boss-mode drives me insane. 

We attended a birthday on the weekend. The plus I want to put in golden font here is that M takes the deferment of his bedtime like a champ. His mood did not get too sour. The flip is the cough he has developed, thanks to the fluctuating temperature/exposure. 

Comments

  1. Figlia is much like my Stella. From what I've read/heard, they push our buttons the hardest because they trust us the most and they feel free to explore their boundaries. Doesn't make it any easier to hear, but at least it's normal?

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  2. I don't think it's too early to learn that food is supposed to be shared by everyone in the family. If she's still hungry, she can have something else, but the main meal must be available for everyone who's scheduled to eat it. Of course, it doesn't help much - whenever I'm eating something different than what my daughter has, she will ask for a bite...and then a little more...and then will eat the rest. Even if it's something I offered to her and she refused.

    My girl is frequently negative about everything, and it makes me crazy to hear her talk about things as if they are all mortally offensive to her. I'm sure I am the cause of it in some way, but I wish she would stop.

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