Skip to main content

Sun/Mon

Sunday:

Do you include the names of dead children in formal invites or greeting cards?

I was preparing the draft for my brother's wedding invite, and I added CheekyBub's name. Had she been alive, her name would have been on it without a doubt.

Then when I came down to writing the names from our family, I paused. I don't know if it is okay.

My deceased grandparents' name has appeared. I used the same logic to write CheekyBub's name.

Its just a draft....it will go through so many hands and eyes before it is approved.

I wonder how her name would be taken. Would they stumble and stop at the name?


Monday:

I am crazy about this little boy in the neighbourhood. He is called Z- and he is 3 years old. He is very naughty. So I kind of enjoy talking to him and being around him, except that I usually miss out on when he's out playing. Y'day he walked right in front of the door, and I came out of the house to speak to him.


Me: Z-, where are you going?
Z (still walking): I am going home. 
Me: But your house is that way. (the exact opposite of the direction he is taking). 
Z: I am going hooooommmmme. 
Me: Ok!

So I followed him and he reached his friend's house. Apparently all houses on the street are his home for him. He started calling out at the iron gate which was a bit tricky for him to open.

I opened the iron gate, and by that time, the inner door had been opened, and this kid (same aged) came out and climbed on the front gate.


Boy: Aunty, did you come to leave Z-?
Me: Yes.

I turned around and started to leave.

Boy: Don't you love me?

I was shocked/surprised. I wasn't expecting such a profound volley coming my way.

Me: Of course, I do.

I walked back, opened the front gate and caressed his cheeks.


Me: I don't know your name.
Boy: My name is D-. 
Me: Okay, D-. Can I go now? 
D-: Yes, And I will have my milk now.


I had this broad smile pasted on my face. I came back home and told the experience to everyone at home.

Good one there!

Comments

  1. Sun - I hope your family decides to include Lola. I think it's so important to remember all those people who aren't with us at such significant times.

    Mon - That is so sweet. Three is my favourite age. Such independent little personalities but still so tiny and cuddly. :)

    ReplyDelete
  2. I have no idea about Sun. It's not something we do or did.
    Monday was a lovely day, then. Glad to hear it. :-)

    ReplyDelete
  3. I don't have any advice for you on your Sunday question. It depends on so many things -- your family, your specific situation, etc. In my family we don't list family members' names on wedding invitations, but it seems like a lovely tradition and I agree with SassyCupcakes, I hope you're able to include her.

    Your Monday story is about the sweetest thing I've ever heard! I bet you were just beaming!

    ReplyDelete
  4. I've often wondered about that (re Christmas cards) that names aren't included like that (usually. Not to say they shouldn't be AT ALL).

    Little boys in the neighbourhood sound cuteness personified

    ReplyDelete
  5. I would think that her name belongs there, but that's me, I think it's important for everyone to remember her...

    What a cute little boy!

    ReplyDelete
  6. Ok... so thos little boys are too adorable! So cute!

    Sunday's a tough one tho. As you say, many people will have input on it, and they may have differing opinions, but if it were left just up to me, CheekyBub's name would be there.

    ReplyDelete
  7. That is just adorable. Little kids are just so cute.

    I have no ideas about your invite situation. On our invitations we don't mention siblings and nieces/nephews, but we do mention parents and sometimes grandparents. Sometimes deceased people are on the invite and sometimes they aren't. My invite only had my mother and my mother-in-law mentioned (since our fathers had both passed on), but the program for the event which named all of the attendants named both of our fathers as well. I guess it all depends on your custom.

    ReplyDelete
  8. Awww Monday! lill boys are adorable... Sun is a little tricky.

    ReplyDelete
  9. The story about the little boys? Adorable.

    I hope they do decide to include your CheekyBub.

    ReplyDelete
  10. Sun - that is hard. I have a good friend who lost her son at 4 months and sometimes his name is included and sometimes it isn't. Though, if you ask her about her children, he is always mentioned.

    Mon - fun! Little boys are special. And definitely march to their own drummer!

    ReplyDelete
  11. Sun-I think if the idea is to list the names of those in the family, then CheekyBub was part of the family just as your grandparents were, albeit for a shorter amount of time. I hope all in your family see it that way.

    Mon-It's good to love and be loved.

    ReplyDelete
  12. Such a sweet story about the little boy!! :)

    About Lola- if they can't add her to the invite, can they mention her in the wedding program? Or add something about her memory if just her name would cause difficult feelings? That is a tough one, and I know it would be up to the wedding couple in the family & friends I know. But it would be nice to have her somewhere. Maybe a little picture of her and the other cousin babies on a table by the guestbook or cards or something like that? If nothing else, you can wear a tiny ribbon/pin/butterfly in her memory.

    ReplyDelete
  13. Boys are so cute!

    I hope they include her in the invitation if not at least in the wedding program. For my nieces wedding they had a special table with flowers, pictures and a beautiful poem for family members that had passed on. I was so happy to see Sami's picture there for everyone to see.

    ReplyDelete
  14. I hope your little girl is remembered in some public way at the wedding. She is part of the family.

    ReplyDelete

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

I Should Have Known

...On the night of 19th when my breasts became hard and sore to touch, the nurses brought me hot water bottles rather than my baby. I should have known. ...Birdman was apparently away to Very Big City with our baby. Every SMS update sent to me about her after 16th Jan was fake. I was a donkey eating at his trough. I should have known. ...Visitors who came to see me in the hospital did not look me straight in the eye. I should have known. ...My mother sounded reluctant every time I asked her on a timeline on when my stitches would be cut and I could travel to Very Big City. I should have known. ...I grieved at how many pricks and tubes were affixed to my little baby while she lay cold and unfeeling at the bottom of an earth pit fatigued from all the effort she put into staying alive. I should have known. ...Family dropped clues on how oxygen deprivation could affect the brain. I spelt it out for them. I told them that Lola was my daughter even if she came out r-e-t-a-r-d-e-d from the o...

Season...

With very limited time and access to the netz, I just want to declare that Lady Season is here. She arrived last Wednesday, and I will someday in future speak of how due to SuperPed's preparedness a crisis was averted. I tend to have firework endings. Her with me, and my first chance of mothering is like a spray of cold water on my face. I am very sleep deprived. Apparently, wise birds said to me that I should sleep when the girl sleeps, but so far my body schedule and kid's schedule are haywire. I hope to be better adapted to this soon. It is tough for me to find net time as of now, and there are a couple of things I want to post online, since CBub's dates also passed by recently, but so far it does not seem to be happening. And I just want to say thanks. Even though I am craptastic at responding, I am reading off and on as I can manage.