(A Post where I play Doubting-Thomas, and hunt for nothing but ulterior motives)
Past Monday, my FIL landed in a hospital when one of his legs refused to cooperate/move/wiggle an inch. He has been recovering from a paralytic attack, and had regained most of his ability to function normally.
After he landed 'there', calls flew back and forth - MIL to DH, MIL to BIL...and so on...
Also, suddenly they were a sentimental mish-mash, my FIL especially so, and my MIL did not have the liberty to be 'paralysed' by emotions. She had to be running around and making arrangements.
My parents visited my in-laws in the hospital and next day my mom was speaking to me when she asked why I did not call on the very day that FIL landed in the hospital? My mother was present when my SIL had called, and my mother thought it was very inappropriate of me to not have called on Monday itself.
(I did call on Tuesday.)
I had to tell it to my mother. My SIL called up because my FIL gave her missed calls... He did not call me at all!
My FIL had turned into a mushball. And he was missing my niece. That is why he called up my SIL.
Who would update him on the little one in the family? Not me. I have nothing to offer in that product line....
I will save you the emotional statements dished on, from the other side as well. OK, here's a sample:
But the comments are enough to score la-la points!
Nopes, you inferred wrong. I like my SIL a lot!
The point is slightly different:
I did not call on that day, nobody bothered to call me either! I just informed my mother the real reason why they may have called my SIL.
My assessment can be very biased, and maybe it totally is. I don't know.
^WiseGuy^
Past Monday, my FIL landed in a hospital when one of his legs refused to cooperate/move/wiggle an inch. He has been recovering from a paralytic attack, and had regained most of his ability to function normally.
After he landed 'there', calls flew back and forth - MIL to DH, MIL to BIL...and so on...
Also, suddenly they were a sentimental mish-mash, my FIL especially so, and my MIL did not have the liberty to be 'paralysed' by emotions. She had to be running around and making arrangements.
My parents visited my in-laws in the hospital and next day my mom was speaking to me when she asked why I did not call on the very day that FIL landed in the hospital? My mother was present when my SIL had called, and my mother thought it was very inappropriate of me to not have called on Monday itself.
(I did call on Tuesday.)
I had to tell it to my mother. My SIL called up because my FIL gave her missed calls... He did not call me at all!
My FIL had turned into a mushball. And he was missing my niece. That is why he called up my SIL.
Who would update him on the little one in the family? Not me. I have nothing to offer in that product line....
I will save you the emotional statements dished on, from the other side as well. OK, here's a sample:
"Oh, we will come over and I will cook whatever you want." ///Food is an essential element of any conversation with the seniors.
"X will take care of you and look after you." ///For God's sake, she is a couple of months beyond being an year old. Everybody knows that she won't be asked to.
But the comments are enough to score la-la points!
Nopes, you inferred wrong. I like my SIL a lot!
The point is slightly different:
I did not call on that day, nobody bothered to call me either! I just informed my mother the real reason why they may have called my SIL.
My assessment can be very biased, and maybe it totally is. I don't know.
^WiseGuy^
Sounds as though you did your best. Family situations, especially involving in-laws, can be so messy.
ReplyDeleteI mentioned to my husband's stepmother last week in passing that my grandfather had died in January. My husband never passes on information like that, and she and I don't talk when we're not together in person, but she was shocked that no one had told her. She insisted on emailing my father to say "sorry your father died 5 months ago."
ReplyDeleteCan't win -- we were chastised for waiting to tell, but if we had told his family about my grandfather right away, it would have resulted in a bunch of condolence calls that my father and grandmother would probably not have wanted to deal with on top of everything else.
I've gotten that before and it's very frustrating! I didn't tell so and so because it wasn't the first thing on my mind. I think you should just up and move. Oh like maybe to the states. The Pacific Northwest to be specific ;o)
ReplyDelete*HUGS*
i always think in these situations darned if you do and darned if you don't. I am glad my family is thousands of miles away....now if only we could move to the opposite coast from DHs family....but then again, there are always the phone calls :)
ReplyDelete((hugs))
My Hubby & I have been together for seven years and married for two. I am never sure how much detail one side wants about the other because they don't ~really~ know each other, only linked by us.
ReplyDeleteI would think you had a lot going on the day FIL went into the hospital and calling your mother Tuesday would be perfectly acceptable!