I am crying... as of now, my cheeks are wet following a breakdown I had, while in a phone chat with mom.
My mother is now working as an OB/GYN with the same centre where I went for my IVF w/ICSI. Today she was chatting up a nurse (who gave me most of the shots and miscellaneous), and the nurse said that S must try and lose some weight. My mother told her that I was already on that path.
That is it! That's when I just cracked with seething rage. I told my mother that if ever doctors or their associates give me this crackpot advice, I am going to ask them to write 5000 times, in their own handwriting:
Since there is nothing else to really tweak in me, the commonest jab seems to be weight issue.
Hell, I am seriously considering asking DH to start smoking, just to improve my chances! By my doctor's logic, some of my SILs should have never conceived (they did!), and druggie cousins should have been impotent and infertile for 400 years to come (two sons on the case in point).
^WiseGuy^
P.S. When I was in school, repeatedly writing things such as "I will not talk in class." 300 or 400 times was a pet punishment. I aced writing these kind of sentences, since I got on the wrong side of my teachers frequently.
My mother is now working as an OB/GYN with the same centre where I went for my IVF w/ICSI. Today she was chatting up a nurse (who gave me most of the shots and miscellaneous), and the nurse said that S must try and lose some weight. My mother told her that I was already on that path.
That is it! That's when I just cracked with seething rage. I told my mother that if ever doctors or their associates give me this crackpot advice, I am going to ask them to write 5000 times, in their own handwriting:
S will get pregnant for sure, if she loses weight.
Since there is nothing else to really tweak in me, the commonest jab seems to be weight issue.
Hell, I am seriously considering asking DH to start smoking, just to improve my chances! By my doctor's logic, some of my SILs should have never conceived (they did!), and druggie cousins should have been impotent and infertile for 400 years to come (two sons on the case in point).
^WiseGuy^
P.S. When I was in school, repeatedly writing things such as "I will not talk in class." 300 or 400 times was a pet punishment. I aced writing these kind of sentences, since I got on the wrong side of my teachers frequently.
That SO makes me mad!! I don't even know what to say!!!
ReplyDeleteI'm overweight, over 40 and I got pregnant! And it certainly wasn't my weight that made me lose my George.
ReplyDeleteDoctors like to latch on to this one thing when they can't think of anything else. Don't you let them get to you!
It WILL happen. I have decided!
xxx
How obnoxious! And unethical for the nurse to discuss you with your mother.
ReplyDeleteMy GP is always on me to lose weight. Why is it that they think that that is an automatic issue? Grrrr. Makes me mad too.
ReplyDeleteI hate it when people assume that weight issues are the root of all health issues, especally related to IF.
ReplyDeleteUmmm, overweight and obese woman get pregnant naturally all the time! Why don't these people understand? I mean, losing weight may help with some issues, but is not some magic cure!
And I agree with Dora, it is pretty unethical for that nurse to be discussing it with your mother!
Ugh, doesn't that make you want to bash someone in the face?
ReplyDelete((((Hugs)))))
My previous RE used to tell me that all the time. What a bile of BS! Sounds more like lazy doctoring to me!
ReplyDelete(hug)
ReplyDeleteyeah, if only they could really give us any assurance of anything!
don't waste your tears on stupid comments like that.
now, about our previous 'correspondence'(LOL), don't feel guilty that DH is losing interest. You are right when you say that our suffering affects them and they are probably more ready to give up on the baby idea if it's to preserve us and the marriage, I guess. But also it would be important for you to find a way to tell him how his lack of present involvement makes you feel. I guess one of the most precious things we should keep during these times is open communication and being frank about our feelings.
I'm so sorry.
ReplyDeleteThat is unfair and cannot be justified.
I just want to go shake some sense into that nurse for you!